Saturday, April 21, 2012

Spector, Prose-Spector.

A text msg conversation between my husband, who--a little background--has severe anxiety and believes in ghosts.

COLE: Doing OK?

ME: Yes. Well mostly. I sort of died.

COLE: What? Are you OK? Do I need to come home??

ME: No no. It's fine. The kids got it covered. They're digging my grave. [I text him a picture of the kids digging with shovels in the garden.] But you might wanna bring home some toilet paper. We're almost out.

ME: For them. Not me. Heh. What would I do with TP? There's no crappers in the afterlife.

COLE: Is your sister there? You really OK?

ME: Sure. I'll probably stick around to haunt you for a while. I mean the kids will need reminders to brush their teeth. What do you think, the words in a foggy mirror trick?

ME: Chris isn't here, but if you want I can pop over and haunt her too. I'll take Gavin's fishy blanket to cover my head. Then it won't be so scary for her.

[20 min. later]

ME: Are you driving home to make sure I'm not really dead?

COLE: No. Sounds like you're on drugs.

ME: Can I get a leopard print-lined coffin? And I wanna be buried with my Weezer albums.

COLE: This is not funny anymore.

ME: See you later, party pooper. = /

See if I haunt you when I really die. No way. I'm hauling my ethereal ass around to find out what really happened to JFK ...And a quick stop at Sylvia Plath's. I've got a few questions for her.

But I was serious about the toilet paper.

10 comments:

  1. Hi Rena, nice to meet via the a to z challenge – Nice post - & I’ve an idea for coffins that might catch on… I’m about to be irreverent so forgive me in advance: My coffin will be wrapped is vinyl. George Clooney underneath me, looking up and Brad Pitt on top looking down on me, that way at least this way I’ll go with a smile on my face…
    Kay
    http://www.1lovelife.blogspot.co.uk/

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    Replies
    1. hahaha. Wow. [fist bump] I heart irreverence. My choices would be Robert Downey Jr. and Hugh Jackman. And Neil Gaiman as an alternate.

      Glad you stopped by!

      Delete
  2. Cute blog. Thanks for stopping by my letter R in the a to z bloghop.

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  3. you get a million awesome points for wanting to be buried with your Weezer albums.

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  4. Hope you got your toilet paper. Thanks for the visit.

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  5. fun dialogue :)
    #60 following
    Kate
    http://solidhappiness.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  6. I was following on Networked Blogs but not Blogger and now I am. Just keep visiting other blogs and leaving your link with a comment and you should pick up more followers.


    Lee
    A Few Words
    An A to Z Co-host blog
    My Main blog is Tossing It Out

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  7. This was so funny! Poor Cole. (: Hope you got the toilet paper too.

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  8. This was so funny! Poor Cole. (: Hope you got the toilet paper too.

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  9. I'm sure there's never a dull moment at your house! I often give my husband instructions at bedtime just in case I don't wake up the next day. I think our husbands would really hit it off! Thanks for following me, and I hope to see more of you! Julie

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